The Sword in the Stone

The Sword in the Stone is another one of those Disney films that never seems to get the respect it truly deserves. It was released in between two other Disney classics that are held in a much higher regard, 101 Dalmatians and The Jungle Book. Those two movies have been praised since their release, and always get the special two disc special edition treatment on home video release. So why does this awkward middle child of the three showcase it's rejection by constantly getting the crappy one disc shaft? Critics claim the film dates itself with Merlin's constant references to the future. Lame excuse if you ask me, considering how Aladdin was loaded with other pop culture references directly from Robin Williams, but Aladdinreaminsseem unharmed by those references twenty three years later. Perhaps Sword in the Stone was missing something the other two had. Out of the three, Dalmations in my opinion does rank supreme. But The Sword in the Stone and The Jungle Book actually aren't that different from each other when you compare their basic story elements. And having watched both of them stoned, I think Sword in the Stone proceeds Jungle Book.

Here's why, and no this is not just the pot talking. The film opens with a gorgeous Sherman Bros. song, detailing the history of the legend of the sword, sweeping over an animated backdrop of London town. The song has those 60's harmonies reminiscent of a children's 45 record. It's a song that I often like to start my morning listening to because it's so innocently beautiful. Listen here:

With the song in place, I've completely submitted myself to the childlike whimsy of Sword in the Stone. A feeling that's heightened when Wart enters the movie. Wart is the perfect example of the young boy in all us young boys at heart, who's head is filled with a childlike sense of wonder and magic. And like a lot of us who were outcasts as children, he's a complete loser. He's another underdog, joining the long ranks of literary and cinematic underdogs we all root for, from David fighting Goliath to Harry Potter fighting Voldemort. Watching it at twenty five, I'm STILL relating to Wart. Sometimes feeling like I'm good for nothing but continuing to find magical glimmers of hope all around me that might offer some payoff in the end. In the end it's he who carries the film, not Merlin.

But of course the movie wouldn't be as fun without Merlin. Especially while stoned. For any smoker who may be watching the film, Merlin is the scary magic man who comes out of nowhere, spilling forth from your head and taking you on a wild ride whether you're buckled in or not. The weed I was smoking that night with my friend Keith however offered a strong but mellow high, so I was prepared. Flying dishes? Throw 'em at me. Higitus Figitus(or was it Hockety Pockety?),\ over a bag that packs everything including the kitchen sink? Page Hermione Granger!! But the best part of Merlin's magic during that high time was his talking owl companion, Archimedes. This owl's got a superpower and it's not the ability to talk. It's the superpower of I can't even, because this bird has HAD it!!

The poor owl has to put up with so much magical shit thrown at him that he's frustrated to no end. Insert the first batch of stoner giggles when Merlin is trying to persuade Archimedes to play along with another one of his blathering old man spells, and Archimedes clearly lets him and the rest of the world know, that the word is: NO NO, NO!!!!

In the famous scene where Wart is scrubbing dishes in a room containing mountains of them, Merlin comes in to speed up the job by having the dishes clean themselves. This of course gets even more out of hand when Sir Ector, Wart's guardian, walks in to see this demonic display of housekeeping. The dishes start attacking him and he rightfully pulls out his sword to defend himself. With one good whack he hits the leading pot(ha, pot), with his sword, only to have his cheap ass sword shatter against the copper-plated cooking ware, and the row of floating dishes ram into his mustached face. This caused me to giggle so much we had to stop the movie, and Keith kept looking at me like I was nuts. He should have known better, he's a bigger stoner than I am. For the record.

And is it just me or is Sir Kay one hot ginger?

Now we get to Madame Mim. This bitch is SCARY!! At least, she is seeing her on a giant flat screen for the first time while stoned out of my gourd. Wart, whose currently a bird in this scene after falling down a chimney in the middle of one of Merlin's...bird teachings, is clearly in danger of being murdered by the Paula Deen of the London kingdom.

What then proceeds is an ultimate showdown between Sorcerer and Sorceress. The film's climax that even a lot of critics agree is the film's biggest highlight. The scene is great, but just like the two previous Disney films I had watched while smoking, the big climax scene didn't excite me as much as the small stuff did. I didn't realize it then but it makes a lot more sense now, when I watch these films high I'm more in awe of all the smaller things. Background animation, music, voice talent, things that maybe we didn't appreciate enough watching these films as kids. And that's a great thing!! Because it provides us with a new experience, not to mention a stoned descent into warm and tingly animated pixel madness.

It's those small things, and the newly gained appreciation for them, that make The Sword in the Stone a true Disney treasure. Whether you let the magic happen on it's own, or take a puff of the magic green leaf to accompany you on your journey. As a man-child who will forever be a kid at heart, Wart is my hero. And The Sword in the Stone is truly an underrated and shockingly shunned, Disney classic.

The Great Mouse Detective:Laughter and the redemption of the 80's classics.

In April 2014 I became interested in rediscovering a lot of the less popular Disney films from the animation canon, particularly the ones from the eighties that were, pre-Little Mermaid. Re-watching them to see if they were better or worse than I remembered, and also to try and find things about them that made them special. After all, some of them had developed cult followings from the generations of children who grew up with them.

One of these films in question was, "The Great Mouse Detective." I brought the movie over to my friend Brad's house one night, for our monthly get together of booze, weed, movies, and laughter. Those four ingredients always made for epic nights. It was our thing and it was what we did best. I can't remember what had possessed me to bring along something as random as the Great Mouse Detective for Brad to watch though, other than the fact that I wanted to watch it and suggested that it might end up being fun to watch stoned. 

We light the pipe and the movie begins. As the opening credits start rolling I'm thinking gosh, I really hope Brad doesn't get bored with this. We had never watched an animated children's movie together after all. But pretty soon the smoke clouded my brain and I was completely focused on the movie. The animation was so eighties, in that it carried that sort of toned down, hand drawn animation we were all so familiar with growing up and seeing in other Disney films from that time such as, Fox and the Hound, Oliver & Company, etc. It was an eighties animated film, and it's staple on that note brought back waves of nostalgia that in my heightened state of mind produced a feeling of being a kid again. And who doesn't love that feeling when they're watching movies?

Enter the great mouse detective himself, Mr. Basil of Baker street(the film's original working title mind you). For a mouse he's a handsome fellow, thanks in part to that wardrobe, and also due to his handsome sophistication.

Suddenly the movie's big main baddie, Ratigan, appears on screen. Voiced by none other than the classically spooky, Vincent Price. Brad and I both shared our awe'd sense of Vincent's brilliant narration as Ratigan's mice cronies sing a song in his honor. Until one of them mentions Ratigan's dirty little secret(he's a fucking RAT). In true diva fashion Ratigan decides this guy's gotta go. And he rings a neat little bell that brings forth a monstrous shadow...

As I stare transfixed at the screen with my pot glazed eyes I focus in on this cat shaped shadow against the animated wall that keeps getting bigger and bigger. Till suddenly, a giant overweight cat paw descends upon the ground, Jurassic Park style. And then it happens. I lose my shit. Giggling all over the place, causing Brad to giggle along with me, the stoner giggles have officially begun. And unbeknownst to either one of us, they were just beginning.

And then there's this dog named Toby who in that moment I realize there's a trend with mice having pet dogs. Mickey and Pluto for instance? Did the animator's play off that or was it a coincidence?

Next is, in my memory, the best scene of the whole film(in terms of the stoner giggles Brad and I were experiencing),the toy shop scene. At the start of the scene, Fidget the Bat is doing some weird thing with the toy soldiers(whom Brad pointed out all had Afros), until he looks out and see's Basil, Dawson, and Olivia approaching from outside. He freaks out, starts flying around, and says, "Oh, I gotta hide, I gotta HIDE!!" in a scratchy, throaty, Tom Waitsy voice. I laugh my ass off while Brad laughs and makes the afro comment. During this scene I started to reload my pipe, and every time I would look up there would be another demented ass toy in the frame. From dolls to Jack-in-the-Boxes, it just wouldn't stop. So I laugh, Brad laughs, and we both laugh together when little Olivia sets off the noisy as fuck electric marching bad. Look familiar by the way?

My memory gets hazy from here, so let's jump ahead to the big confrontational scene Basil has with Ratigan. Proving himself balsy, Basil screams at Ratigan that he is nothing but a sewer rat. And Vincent Price, or sorry, Ratigan, has this fantastic moment where he stands frozen with a painful smile etched on his diseased face for about five long seconds. Before finally snapping his compact mirror shut. It's a great moment in which Brad and I both held in high regard with our laughter and amazement in how much we saw Vincent Price in that moment.

Two exciting moments happen after this within close proximity to each other. The first is the great escape made from the giant mouse trap machine, and the second is the epic climax from within the Big Ben clock tower. Much like watching the epic dragon sequence in Sleeping Beauty, these moments went by too fast for me. I was completely in them while they were happening with straight on stoner focus. But knowing they were coming, my anticipation was too high and I got too caught up in them before the next thing I knew they were over. Brad mentioned something about Big Ben being a level on Kingdom Hearts, which I never played. 

Overall, the Great Mouse Detective was a great Disney stoner experience. The main reason being that it was pure comedy. I'll never forget the laughter that Brad and I both got to share for it together. It carries with it that 80's sense of wondrous hope that the Disney animators were desperately clinging to at the time, hoping they could resurrect that classic feeling that Disney films once carried. I think the movie goes to show that they were getting there. And what they ended up with was indeed destined to become an underrated Disney classic. Furthurmore, it was after that night that I decided to set my goal in place. The goal to watch every Disney film stoned, and discover what really happens when you wish upon a bud.

Sleeping Beauty: The one that started it all.

I remember watching Sleeping Beauty for the first time when I was eight years old. My grandmother surprised me with a VHS Masterpiece edition one day, and I fell in love with it. Since then I've considered it to be one of the greatest Disney films ever made, and Maleficent has become my favorite Disney villain of all time.

In the Fall of 2013 I was under a max amount of stress, to the point where it was too much to handle. I was a full time student, living with my emotionally abusive father, and going through health issues that were making me feel fragile and anxious. No stranger to weed at the time, I turned to it to help calm my nerves and settle my anxiety over my health and studies.

One night I broke out a joint  I had safely tucked safely away and smoked all of in my room while my Dad was at work. The decision to watch Sleeping Beauty afterwards wasn't planned. It came down to there not being anything else to watch that seemed interesting. And so, nice and high, I snuggled into my futon mattress on the floor, and popped in the 1959 Disney classic.

I hadn't thought about how it would feel to watch a movie high, even though I had done it once before for the first time prior to that night. Suddenly I realized that everything that was happening in the movie was heightened through my sense of sight and sound. The classic score and vocal arrangements that take place at the beginning of film were utterly beautiful. And that's when I realized that this was going to be an experience, because up until that point I never even bothered to pay attention to the stuffy old, pomp and circumstance type music the movie was full of. Now suddenly it was invading my ears like a trumpeting army.

The film continues and the three good fairies are bestowing their gifts upon Princess Aurora. Suddenly Maleficent appears, and yay!! My favorite villain of all time has arrived. But hold on, she looks TERRIFYING. Commanding attention with her demonic presence and that haunting familiar voice of Eleanor Audley, Maleficent is stealing the show and searing your ears with power. Suddenly she bangs her staff down upon the castle floor, resulting in a chilling clatter of a sound that strikes you like a whip across the face. It's these little things that you don't take note of when you're watching this classic Disney movie over, and over again. Those little things are heightened and then suddenly it becomes a completely engrossing experience like you're there, inside of the story every step of the way. Watch here:

The rest of the film continues on, and my senses have settled a bit. Next thing I know the fairies have returned Aurora to the castle and Maleficent appears to claim her prophecy. Cue the music once again, and my ears are pinned to that unsettling score of murderous intent. Everything's dark as Aurora slowly walks down that green lit corridor that has appeared out of a wall. The fairies chase after her as the tempo picks up. We know what's coming and yet we don't anymore.

The film continues, the epic climax is over before we can process that it's happening(some things never change even when you're high), and as the movie ends my high has almost all but passed. I didn't think then that this was going to be the start of something special. A goal that was going to lead to an even bigger goal of magic and euphoria. All I thought was wow, that was an unexpectedly interesting experience....